Other Stories of Addiction/Recovery

Wrestling with Addiction and Winning

First of all, Josh, thank you for the music and the inspiration. I have been sober for 2.5 years and I feel like I don’t get the opportunity to share my story to anyone. So, thank you.

I was a heavy partier in college. I had played football all my life, and my plan was to become a teacher and a football coach. College came around and I was on the football team there as well. I made THOUSANDS of mistakes due to drinking, just like most people. After football came to an end it was all down hill. A fifth of whiskey every day. EVERY SINGLE DAY… for four years.

Thanksgiving day 2020, I had been puking non stop for about 3 weeks. I couldn’t hold water down. I decided to lie to my parents and say I had Covid. I didn’t want them seeing me like this. Well, I forgot to buy booze! All the stores are closed. I’m by myself. I can’t hold down beer or anything from a gas station. I NEEDED LIQUOR. I was panicking. Passing out. I felt like I was about to have a seizure.

I eventually drove myself to the hospital. They threw some benzos at me and said, “have a good night.” Immediately, started drinking again. I did go to AA meetings a few times while I was still hooked.

On December 28th, I ask my very supportive, close friend, a youth leader from when I was a teenager, to just sit and talk with me so I can let it be known I need help. We scheduled to meet at noon, but guess who over slept because they were drunk. So, we rescheduled for the next day which was 100% supposed to happen. We met on 12/29/2020 and he read *his* daily devotion to me. Not planned out at all. The devotion was 100% about me fearing that I cannot change but telling me that I can and I will, through my faith in God. Eventually, I made it to New Year’s Day. I took a shot of vodka after another panic attack. My mom drove me to the hospital and they sent me to detox. I am so thankful that detox exists. I was scared for my life.

Okay, now is where it gets crazy. I am a proud Christian before and after recovery. I’m not here to change anyone’s mind but man this was powerful. While I was at detox (day 4 or 5 I suppose) I was in the worst of the withdrawals. Physical, emotional, and mental pain. If you know, you know. I was in my cot praying for help, crying, and screaming in my pillow. I suddenly felt someone hug me which was nice because sometimes that’s all someone needs. I didn’t know who it was, but I said thank you with my head in my pillow and just let it happen for about 30 seconds. Then they let go and I sat up to see them. Nobody was there. I believe that was my grandmother who passed in 2016, who always loved and cared for me beyond what she needed to do.

They let me out of detox and now I get to share how this has impacted my life! I’ll be less detailed here but still get the point across.

I lost SIXTY pounds and am in the absolute best shape of my life. I started coaching wrestling (my “secondary” sport) and fell back in love with it. Found a new job in a different city (about 2 hours from home) living with my best friend, started training jiu jitsu on top of my wrestling. Got a blue belt in less than a year (2 years on average for most people!) and started training in MMA. I began teaching mma/fundemental jiu jitsu at my awesome gym, and finally got to step in the cage! Absolutely dominated my first fight! I am also now a head wrestling coach at a well-established school with amazing kids. I am finally happy! I am where I am supposed to be! This would NOT have happened if I was still boozing.

ANYONE who beats addiction is a hero to me. So, if you read this and are at this point, I personally want to thank you. Sobriety fucking rocks.

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