I was in the middle of doing chemotherapy when my dad died unexpectedly. Several months after that I had to have a major surgery to remove organs with cancer because the chemo didn’t work completely. I was in constant pain. The physical pain and the emotional pain weighed heavily on me every day. I mistakenly got pain medications filled in two different states because I had the surgery in one state and was recovering in another. It made me feel better while I was taking the pain killers because I could kind of mentally check out and not have to think about anything.
I eventually found ways to keep getting pain killers, and I guess I got addicted. For about a year, I just didn’t want to feel anything anymore. I soon realized that I couldn’t keep up the habit, and I had severe withdrawals. I didn’t feel like myself anymore, and I wanted to go back to being the happy person I was. I had a few young nieces and nephews, and they became my reason for wanting to get better. It was a tough road, but I eventually got through it. Outside of these painkillers, I never did any hard drugs, but it seems like opioid addiction is way more common, and easier to get sucked into. I’ve had a few more minor surgeries since then, and I am always careful to only take what is absolutely necessary for pain.
